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The Authentic-Self Note Pad

I Reflect What Is

Amy Choi Jan 22, 2017
during Authentic Self Casework Workshop (2nd Half) at the 10th case study

Dad...
Mum...
Dad...
Mum...
I love! My Dad...
I hate! My Mum...
I hate! Myself...

Hurt...
Pain...

Tears
Cleansed the wounds in my heart
Wails
Released the suppressed memory

I reflect what is
I notice what is

Tired, I am
Please let me rest!


Christmas

Daughter of Heaven, December 14, 2016, Morning

Christmas
A birthday of a man called Jesus
Said to be the son of God

Who could this man be?
Someone many have never met
But somehow believe
That he has the power of healing
And the gift of great teachings

Through the way he talked, lived
And through his own sufferings

Teachers and healers
Are all experiencing
A path so special
Maybe not as great as that of Jesus
But nevertheless
Magical

Let teachers and healers walk our own pathways -
Neurological, psychological
Physical, metaphysical......

Shining
Smiling
Despite our own sufferings

Perhaps others will follow

And we celebrate
This day we are or are not together

A day called
Christmas
When the great teacher and healer
Jesus Is being well-remembered


Ripples

Amy Choi, Taisho Lake, November 6, 2016

The lake
is calm with no ripples
at all

What ripples
is only
the human heart


Here I Return

Daughter of Heaven, November 20, 2016, Morning

If
One day
I am lost in that place

Please
hold my hand
caress my head
whisper my name
and tell me

My dear
Now
You are here


Secret

The sound of rain hissing and tapping
tell me to listen clearly
The biggest secret
hidden inside
every body.

Amy Choi,
in “Touch For Health” Casework Workshop,
Shenzhen,
18 Oct 2016

 


Eyes of This Moment

May 17, 2016, Written after the Brain Gym®101 "Action Balances for Seeing" in Beijing  By Divine Daughter

The eyes
Of this moment
Enjoying
The gold in sunset beneath lakeside


Encounter of Clouds

May 17, 2016, Written in Beijing, By Divine Daughter

Awoken from dream
Lingering in dream

Encountered, yet hurtled past
Within reach, yet unable to grasp

Like a splash of clouds
In the sky


Original Sin

May 25, 2016, Written at Hong Kong after a doing a day of private sessions By Divine Daughter

Adam
Eve
Naked in the Garden of Eden
Experiencing the most ancient joy and happiness of Mankind

One day
Seduced by the serpent
They defied God's warning
And ate the forbidden fruit they must not eat
On the tree of the knowledge of good and evil

Ever since
Like God
They are able to distinguish good from evil

To experience Shame
Of their own body
And Eternal Pain


Joyful Journey - to You for the New Year

8 Jan. 2016, Written at Hong Kong, By Divine Daughter
(Photo taken in the South Pole trip in New Year's Eve by Amy Choi's mother)

It's just good being on earth
Living every step here and now
Be it joy or sorrow, parting or reunion V all to be experienced
Be it birth or ageing, illness or death V all worthy of value

Say goodbye to worldly suffering in this life
Love-hate intertwines in balance
Nothingness touches the heart like a clear mirror
Seeing smiling Budda in every leaf and flower

Animals, humans, extra-terrestrials
All regenerate at the return of the beginning
Old souls from all places gather
One whole family Jesus or Buddha

Joyful journey is the essence
Manifesting who you are, your authentic self
Witness miracle in every moment
Knowing how to play is a grace

Here it comes, 2016, Yeah!


Divine Constellations

12 Dec. 2015, Written at Hong Kong By Divine Daughter

Slowly
By slowly
Divine constellations
Fall in front of my eyes

This life
Past lives
And the lives forever


Dream of Play

11 Nov. 2015, Written at Hong Kong Amy Choi

I am planting in the sky
Maybe
One day
I can greet you in the sky garden

I am watering on earth
Maybe
One day
I can walk with you along a blooming path

I dive into the ocean
Maybe
One day
Inside an old castle at the sea bottom
I can find traces of our playing together in the past

If we
In the dream
Can again meet in the sky
On earth or
In the sea

I shall
To you
Tenderly
Smile

Maybe
On that Day

You and me can
Get together again
Inside a castle carpeted with fresh flowers
Play
Laugh
Wander
Only till dawn shall we say
Goodbye


Reflection of Morning Exercise

17 Jun. 2015, Written at Evergreen Resort, Shenzhen Amy Choi

Just as lychee ripens in June
Morning tendon transformation invigorates the body
A good sweat revitalizes the system
Bringing about the well being of body and soul


Fruits from Nowhere

20 Jun. 2015, Written at Evergreen Resort, Shenzhen Amy Choi

Not playing basketball for long
Casual aiming and shooting
A big mango appears on the floor from nowhere
Mouth waters for the delicious look and fragrant smell


Maternal Love

10 May 2015 (the day after Mother's Day), Hong Kong Amy Choi

Not heeding day and night
Not quitting no matter how hard
Not because of anything
Just because you are my daughter

Unconditional giving
Unreserved caring
Not because of anything
Just because you are my sons

As light as feather
As sweet as flowers

Wish my mother health and longevity
Wish my sons happiness and freedom

Amen


The Grace of Universal Love

12 April, 2015 Hong Kong Amy Choi

The stars in the sky
Are moving and real

The grace of universal love
Belongs to you
No matter if you can see it

The daughters of heavens
Please stay rolling in the heavens!


My Power

26 March, 2015 Hong Kong Amy Choi

My power
Comes from
The ancient memories
Buried deep down in the ocean

Human beings who were already dead
Need to pass through
Waters deep down in the ocean
To search
To touch
Infinite sadness

When sadness is over
Perhaps tears will leave behind
Tear marks
That remain unchanged after thousands of centuries

That forever exists
In a corner of the infinite universe

To wait for the next group of
Highly intelligent human beings to discover


Astounding Beauty

31 December, 2014 Zhengzhou, China Amy Choi

Days after days
Years after years
Through countless changes of ocean and land

High mountains bred Shaolin

Great sky
Beautiful land
Astounded people

(The picture was taken by Ho Yu Yat from an access trail of Shaoshi Mountain in Song Mountains. According to the geological history, the Song Mountain area in Henan, where the renowned Shaolin Monastery was cultivated, has undergone six transformations between ocean and land. It had been a vast of ocean for six times. It can be truly said as having gone through great changes.)
Perhaps knew each other in our previous lives


Living Out The Rainbow Of Your Authentic Self

August 20, 2014 Amy Choi Hong Kong

Never mind about the rush of the rainbow
Only glad that she appears
Between the gap of sunshine and rain

Never mind about the dreaminess of the rainbow
Only enchanted by her beauty
Between the gap of heaven and earth

Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet
Let your authentic colours emerge

May you live out the rainbow of your authentic self
On every step of your life


Prayer Wheel

August 21, 2014, Hong Kong, by Amy Choi

Life after life
Search after search

By a friendly look
You invited me to turn the prayer wheel with you

Reincarnation
Reincarnation

Our heart and spirt know
You and I
Perhaps knew each other in our previous lives

Turning the prayer wheel
Listening to the prayers
Smelling the fragrant incense
In the dark temple

Namo Amitābhā
Namo Amitābhā

Tears surge like a spring
After calming down
I know
It is enough

No need to wave our hands
No need to exchange friendly look again
No need to say goodbye
No need to give blessings

I leave and go on my way
You continue to turn your prayer wheel

Most beautiful
Most beautiful


Authentic Self

July 3, 2014
Amy Choi
Hong Kong

If
There is no thought
No feeling
What is then
My authentic self?

If
There is no achievement
No possession
What is then
My authentic self?

If there is no past
No future
What is then
The me that exists now?

If
There is no here
No there
Where is the me
In?

When everything such as these
disappear
I
Just stand in front of
Me

That
Most primitive
Most lively
The little
Spiritual
Me

From nothing
To something
From something
To nothing

From there
I begin
From there
I come to the end


April 26, 2014 Amy Choi (Kyoto)
 
The Beginner's Mind
 
 
One step
Next step
And another step
Walk each step with
The beginner's mind

One word
Next word
And another word
Say each word with
The beginner's mind

One thought
Next thought
And another thought
Receive each thought with
The beginner's mind

No expectation
Just wait

Everything
Just is
 

Mar. 15, 2014 Amy Choi (Hong Kong, China)
 
A Double Doodle Play drawing created by Feng Ze Ying
who is studying in Vancouver inspired me to write a poem,
Reflection of the Soul. I see peace and colorfulness
deep inside the painter's soul in this drawing.
 

Double Doodle Play Drawing by Feng Ze Ying on March 15, 2014
 

Reflection of the Soul

 
Boatman of a lone boat
Rowing the boat
Everyday
In a calm lake
Looking at
His own
Reflection of the soul

One day
He finally saw
Mirror images
Between
Worlds of
Water surface
And
Water bottom
Coexist
Reflecting upon
Each other

This moment
Colours of the heart
Hidden in him for a long time
Cause colourful worlds of
Water surface
And
Water bottom
Emerge naturally
Through both hands

This moment
Only
Silence
And
Tears
Can fully express
What he saw today
Beauty
And heart-felt
Joy
 

Mar. 2, 2014, Dalian, by Amy Choi
 
Seeing
 
Seeing with ease
Seeing with softness
Discover
Beauty and goodness
Of the world
 
Shapes
Light
Texture
Movement
Volumn
Slowly emerge
In my body
And in my mind
 

Double Doodle Play scratch art by Amy Choi
 

Jan. 2011, Hong Kong, by Amy Choi

2014 New Year Message


 

Nov. 25, 2013, Shanghai, by Amy Choi

Only Looking At You

I look at you with my mind's eyes

It seems
Nothing else there is to be done

And it seems
Nothing else there is to give you 

Amen!


Oct. 22, 2013, Hong Kong, by Amy Choi

Dreaming

Learn to dream
Dare to dream
Or else
You will only
Live in the dream of others

Oct. 10, 2013, Hong Kong, by Amy Choi

What I want and what I need

Notice what I want
And
What I need
Make good distinctions between them
Then link
What I want and
What I need
Together

Oct. 7, 2013, Dalian, by Amy Choi

North Eastern People

Terrified of your ferocity
Fond of your candour
Hurt by your firmness
Drown in your love
Next year
Southern water will return
To accept your immersion

Jul 19, 2013, Beijing, by Amy Choi

Celebrate Impermanence

Coming as breezes
Going as dreams
But not lessening its authenticity

Arriving loudly
Departing silently
But not leaving trace of colour or sound

If we can play together
It is a gift of fate from heaven

Treasure
Celebrate
Impermanence
And the split seconds
We play
And resonate
Together
In time and space


Double Doodle Play Artwork
The Rabbit and the Tree in the Sky,
By Neoline Beraud-Xie, 5.5 years old.
Click to view image

Mar 30, 2013, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Waiting

Time
Passes second by second
Darkness and silence
Cause time
To pause endlessly


I
In this limitless
Dark
Silent
Paused space
Await the arrival of dawn
 
Distance
Makes me feel that
You are so close
And yet so far
Within reach
But untouchable --
In two different worlds
 
I
In this limitless
Dark
Silent
Paused space
Feel the distance
And await the arrival of dawn

Jan 18, 2013, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Hug My Shadow

If you cannot talk to me
you can talk to my shadow
 
If you cannot hug me
you can hug my shadow
 
Perhaps
I will be able to get it





 

 

Jan 18, 2013, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Hope

Seeing your bottom smooth and soft
my heart is filled with hope

Because I am old?
or because I see
your infinite future?

 

 

 

 

 

Dec 13, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Treasure
Ask me not where I came from
nor where I will go
only treasure
the times
when we meet
and when we say good-bye
in a time and space called random.

Written in the sky on an autumn morning in 2012 by Amy Choi

Experience
A piece of tea leaf
Let me
lightly
tasted the love of a previous life
A short night
let me experience
infatuaion, passion and longing
Experience
Experience
and again, experience......
Let love transform and settle down
Fascinated or not fascinated
may it be light and natural.

Aug 30, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

The Love That May Not
The love that may not speak
The desire may not seek

I buried
the words of love
the seek of desire
in a box residing
deeply in the heart

When I am lonely
I can open the box
and carefully
listen to
look at
have a taste of
that
burning
living
helpless
beautiful
eternal
feeling of --
The Love That May Not.

Aug 27, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Face II
A pair of blurry eyes
opened half-way
from deep sleep
 
In don!|t know in how many silent nights
I vaguely saw your face
in the black-blue
soft
light and shadow of the moon
 
A faint
layer of
excitement
curiosity
fountained up
from the heart
 
"Is that you?"
 
My arms
hugged you
my legs
wrapped around you
my lips kissed you
 
A thin
layer of
security
warmth
fountained up
from the sacral
 
"Is that you?"
 
Suddenly
a heavy
slap on the face
from reality
opened up fully
my blurry eyes

 
I saw
actually
another face!
 
A silky
layer of
self-blame
helplessness
fountained up
from the brain
 
I closed my eyes
and wait
for the face
that I will see
with the half-open eyes
under the light and shadow of the moon
in the silent night.


Aug 2, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Face
Thousands and millions of faces
passed me by
rubbing the sides of my body

Only your silly face
has unknowingly ran into my heart
leaving the mark of fire
one after each one

It was --
pulling
suspension
love
desire
attachment
drunkenness
the planting of past-life relationship into this life

May the light of wisdom
guide me through the darkness with no name
lead me to the exit and the shore.

 

Jul 30, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Fog
Fog --
nuturing a pair of eyes
tired by trying to see too clearly
Clarity --
is not what they want to see only
Analysis --
is not what they know how to do only
Blur --
like a dream, so mysterious, so beautiful
Chaos --
gives the eyes non-linear space for imagination and movement
Eyes --
please get a good rest!
Enjoy the blur and the chaos that Fog is giving you

Jul 24, 2012, Dalian by Amy Choi

Struck by Lightening

Lightening struck me from the left
Touched and moved my body and eyes that used to only see darkness
Scenes after scenes of repeated happenings
Emerged before me in the darkness

Lightening --
passed me through
space and time
realities and dreams
memories and imagination

The I who was afraid of dreams come true
blocked my
body and mouth
stuck me in the space of
motionlessness and speechlessness.

Jul 1, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Heartache
Loneliness
Has become a gift's wrapping paper for you to be unwrapped
Has become an enjoyment of adjusting yourself.
The surety, freedom and painlessness that you talk about
And the romance that you open only for yourself
Has become my heartache.

Jul 7, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Riding on Clouds and Mist
Stepping on the sea of clouds
Riding on the mist
I look into the distance at people's movements
And listen to what they say

Clouds and mist
Are my
Resting place

Across the clouds and mist
I observe them

Distance--
Lest their matters
Disturb me again.

May 26, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Wild Horse
The wild horse that lives in the space of my thinking
I will let it go out
to experience and to see.
Past lives and this life
The good and the bad
The Yin and the Yang
The right and the wrong
I shall let them appear and present themselves
and shall face them.

Millions of Phenomena
The millions of evil phenomena that appear in my mind
I am not afraid any more
I do not resist
I learn to
see them
observe them in a relaxed way
talk to them and shake hands with them.

The millions of beautiful phenomena that appear in my mind
I do not hold onto them
I do not hold tight
I learn to
smile at them
enjoy them freely
talk to them and say good bye.

In Between Positive and Negative, Heaven and Earth
Positive energies reside in heaven and earth.
Humans exist between positive and negative, heaven and earth
to live out, to draw the rainbows of their lives.

May 14, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Initiation of the Sacred Woman
The sacred you -
the symbol of the geometry of the beginning and the ending -
is prepared to jump
to initiate
your sacred self.

You know
that the safety robe
is tied to your ankles.
The action of "jumping"
is easy and familiar to you.
 
But
if there is an accident
perhaps
you will experience
death and
rebirth after jump.

Let's jump down together!
 
...Your heart and belly are not connected.
The heart has hidden herself in a forest
lost
and cannot be found.
 
The only way to invite her back
is to answer "What is this material world?"
If your answer is right,
the heart
will come back...
 
"What is this material world?"
"It's light."
The heart
still hides in the forest...
 
"What is this material world?"
"It's nothing."
The heart
comes back slowly
and connects itself to the belly...
 
The moment of death
is calm.
Nothing can be heard.
Time has stopped.
We are enjoying the calm and
sacred moment.
 
The old self has ended.
The new self has begun.

May 12, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Loneliness
You've gone asleep nice and sound beside my pillow.
I am still longing for your loving touch.
This moment
only
loneliness
fills the black hole in my heart
accompanies me in going through
the long
silent night.

May 8, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

A Woman Who Could Not Be Completely Bad
Smoked a cigarette
Listened to the sea
Hoping that the taste of the cigarette
and the sound of waves
would help me recall
the times where I was completely bad.
I smoked three cigarettes
tried very hard to think.
This good woman still could not be completely bad!
Because she's afraid?
Because she didn't know?
Regrets!

My Godly Needle in the Sea
You are my Godly Needle in the Sea
When I floated afar
You always brought me back
Without you
I don't know how far I would have floated.

May 5, 2012, Kyoto, Japan by Amy Choi

Think of You
Think of you
Love you
Hug you
Touch you
Kiss you
I want you.

Woman's Body
About this woman's body,
I fully accept
the Fate
she brings to me.

April 12, 2012, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

A Middle World
In day-light, I live in a world awake.
In night-darkness, I live in a world dreamy.
I exist in a middle world that is halfway between being awake and dreamy.

In day-light, I live in a world of matter.
In night-darkness, I live in a world of spirit.
I explore a middle world where matter and spirit cross.

In day-light, I live in a world of time.
In night-darkness, I live in a world of space.
I pass through a middle world in which time and space co-exist.

In day-light, I live in a world where movements are conscious.
In night-darkness, I live in a world where movements are unconscious.
I write poems, draw, sing and dance
in a middle world in which movements come from a space between conscious and unconscious.

This mysterious and interesting middle world
has been lost and forgotten by us.

I invite you to join me
to enjoy this middle world unknown to many - the world of rainbows -

to exist, to explore, to pass through,
to write poems, to draw, to sing and dance.

No Word

In front of you,
my mouth was open;
but no word came out

March 28, 2012, Dalian by Amy Choi

When Northern and Southern Waters Meet
When northern water is channelled to the south, there is happiness, harmony and softness.
When southern water is channelled to the north, there are some effects.
When both waters are channelled to their appropriate uses, things become vibrant.

December 2, 2011, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

Crazy
Crazy beasts surfaced in my mind
one by one
tempted to come out from the cage
and move
to touch the crazy world.
In the cage, they lingered;
In the cage, they looked out;
imagining the day
when they are out exploring the crazy world.

Watching the Moon

By 11th century Japanese poet Izumi Shikibu

Watching the moon
at midnight,
solitary, mid-sky,
I knew myself completely,
no part left out.









October 23, 2011, Hong Kong  by Amy Choi

Red
The red in your wounds
and your weeping sounds
are staining all over my body
like blood.
We quietly wait for
Time
to bring to us
the messages of healing and awakening.

Beautiful Soul
What a beautiful soul you are!
My dear friend,
please do not ask me
what your mission is in life.
Because I don't know.
Maybe
you'll know
later.

Tired Bird
A tired bird
is lying
in front of you
longing for your tender touch and care.

 

September 27, 2011, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

What is Enough?
Why are you still starring at me?
Do you think this is not enough?
Let's go out for a run!
Run, run, run.
One loop, two loops, three loops...
Please let me know when it is enough.

100%
I gave my 100%.
How about you?
Let's dance
and celebrate!

  

August 7, 2011, Hong Kong by Amy Choi

You are My Friend
You are my friend -
perhaps you still don't know.
I will to do things for you,
sharing pains and joys,
devoting time and life.
Just because,
you are my friend.

To Move Or Not To Move
Why are you still not moving?
If you choose to move, I will be with you.
I have been carrying your burden for too long.
It's so heavy. I have no energy any more.
To move or not to move, it is up to you!
I shall not carry it any more.
I am going now.

July 31, 2011, Shenzhen by Amy Choi

Authenticity
I wait and feel for authenticity - the movements and postures of the subject, and all the feelings, textures, sounds and colours around him/her - to show up in my body and my mind.

The Dark Side
I would like to smoke a cigarette with you.
By doing so, it seems...
we can touch the dark side we have in common.
By doing so, it seems...
we can share a common feeling -
a moment in which pain and joy, dream and reality flash out simultaneously.
It makes us feel we are fully present, here and now.
You are so familiar with this "painful-joy". You love it.
Two fingers holding the cigarette tight,
touching the dark side we have in common.


July 20, 2011, Hong Kong, China by Amy Choi

Summer Fruits

I went hiking in an outlying island in Hong Kong on July 19, my birthday. On the hill, I saw many summer fruits - longyan, youjinzi. Although it wasn't the first time I saw these fruits, it was the first time I noticed and "discovered" that this was probably the scene in Nature the day I was born forty something years ago. There were many fruits blossoming - giving the world a sense of fruitfulness and joy. I picked a youjinzi and put it into my mouth. It was first bitter, and then sweet. No more thirsty feeling afterwards.

When I came back in the evening, a friend told me that a baby of a pregnant woman with whom I did a balance with before was born!

He is also a summer fruit. What a coincidence!

I am offering these photos to this baby. It's the scene in Nature the day he was born.

Blessings to him and his family!


.
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